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MUTANTBEARMAN
Musings of a Queer Bear/Man
The Helmet Buster 
13th-Aug-2010 04:01 pm
 
When I jack off, I tend to use a kind of over-the-tip approach. I've not met many other men who do it this way.

I mean, jacking off is one of my favorite sports. The only thing that keeps me from it is another man enjoying my cock in other ways.

But no one taught me how to do it. I hear stories of brothers and cousins teaching each other to jack off surreptitiously in a barn or in the bunkbed, but that never happened for me. (God how I wanted it to! My brothers experimented with friends - or so I've heard - but they never shared their expertise with poor little Glenny.) I did jack off in front of my step-brother once and that was cool, but by then I'd already figured the whole thing out. 

Truth is, the first time I did it consciously I was nine years old and after my first little dry orgasm I was convinced I'd invented it. I even had a secret name for it (though for the life of me I can't remember what it was). From that point, I was hooked. I jacked my little boy cock every day, quietly in the bathroom. At least I hope it was quietly. I couldn't tell. I was too fully engaged in the enormous sensations wracking my body to know if I was quiet or not.

Not much later, my brother had the unfortunate experience of running into the kitchen one day with cum in his hand saying, "Mom! Mom! I think I'm dying!" and this led to "The Talk" from our (very brave) parents. I learned that my invention wasn't actually mine after all, but that it was healthy and normal and that I shouldn't do it to much (uh... is thirteen times in a row too much?), but it's okay to do it.

Then one day when I was ten, at the end of my little humpty-dumpty, the white stuff came out. And whoa! what a difference it made. Orgasms felt more... I don't know... finished. It was messy, alright, and that led to some very clever innovations in cum cleaning. What kind and color of cloth stains, what ones don't. How to keep toilet paper from shredding all over your dick and fingers. And finally discovering the joy and pleasure of the easiest, most efficient method of cleaning up (As Auntie Mame says of pickled rattlesnake, "It's pure Protein!")

Anyway, what was I talking about? Oh yeah. The over-the-tip approach. I tend to grip my cock with the fingertips and thumb surrounding the shaft with my palm over the tip of the glans. Like a penis train poking into a tunnel made of my fingertips. I like that method best. Really gets me off. I've tried the full shaft grip (nice bicep workout and I love watching the cum shoot) and the two-fingertips under/thumb on top approach (a bit too dainty for me, but a nice change of pace and the control makes it great for edging). I've tried the overhand grip, which really is nice and from the reaction of others must be fun to watch (like whack-a-mole without the whacking device).

But over-the-tip is boss for me. Good grip, nice full contact, and in the end, most of the cum ends up in your hands, not all over the floor.

Dan Savage says that you should switch up the ways you masturbate so that your cock doesn't get used to a specific way of being used. That's good advice. I try to switch it up and have fun (what else is a cock for?) But old habits die hard and with the over-the-tip approach, I can be sure my cock won't die hard, but fully satisfied.

So, go ahead, jack it, you sexy puppies. It's good for you. And Daddy approves.
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